New Year!

I have started a new blog two times in 2011. I just didn't know what to blog about! I have been slightly depressed in the new year. Just thinking about what is to come and what came to an end. I am starting to get out of my "funk," and decided to write. The question still remains though, what to write about?! It seems the hot topic is New Years Resolutions. I've never been one to make resolutions. I tend to just get things done when I set out to do them. Maybe it is because I have a bad memory, and I'll forget what I set out to do unless I do it right away?! Or maybe it is because I don't believe most people follow through on their resolutions, so it's pointless. Either way, I'm setting out on a new year without any resolutions. As always my main goal is to let the Lord guide my paths. The Bible tells us not to worry about tomorrow, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." -Matthew 6:34. I whole heartedly believe this, because we do not have any idea what tomorrow will bring. Why worry about it?! Sometimes I find myself worrying and it is so pointless. Worry does not change the future, it only makes the day ever more dreadful. I say "ever more dreadful" because I'm learning that life does not hold much happiness for me in and of itself. The world has nothing for me, and it will all be gone in an instant. Sometimes I drive by markings on the pavement and I wonder if someone died in that accident. Is that all there is to life? You live, you die, and all that is left from your life is markings on the pavement? Maybe there are some belongings that family will fight over. For what?! Will those belongings bring them happiness? No. So, what is there?

At the beginning of 2011 I was/am still depressed. Why? Because I ask myself, "what have I done that means anything to anyone?" Will I just be markings on the pavement (not prophesying that I will die in a car accident, just using this statement as a hyperbole (exaggeration), if you will, to emphasize the nothingness of life), or will I mean something that will be passed on? Long story short, I feel bad that I have not done anything for anybody this year that means anything. The question then is, "what can I do this year that means anything?" I want to do more. I want to help people. The Bible tells us in 1 Timothy 5 to care for the widows. Other verses say:

1 Peter 4:10 says, " 10 Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms. "

Mark 9:35, "35 Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.”

John 15:12-13, "12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. "

1 Peter 4:10-11 "10 Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms. 11 If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen. "

The point is that the Bible is FULL of commands to serve others, and I fall SO far short of this it's depressing. I understand that it is only by the grace of God that I am saved, but Faith without works is dead. My desire in this year is to honor God. To help and love others. To be a servant to others, and to make a difference in peoples lives. I would like people to remember me and know me by my love.
John 13:34-35. If that is a resolution so be it.. Hello 2011!